“It is easier to judge a man’s mind by his questions than by his answers.”
What is Shay of Vancouver about?
An exploration for the kind of experiences that change us from within. The changes we did not see coming, the moments of coincidence that feel like more than chance, the relationships that alter the course of a life.
It is also a space for honest communication, self-awareness, and finding the courage to use your voice more fully and authentically in everyday life.
What draws you to what goes unspoken?
Because so much of life is communicated without words. A pause in someone’s voice. A shift in energy. The tension beneath a conversation. The feeling that something important is being felt but never fully said aloud.
I’m interested in the emotional layers that exist beneath our words and reactions. The ways those experiences influence how we communicate, protect ourselves, and make sense of who we are becoming.
What experience changed the way you relate to others?
Grief changed the way I understand what it means to be deeply interconnected with someone, to carry that longing in my heart and its weight in my body, and to truly experience aloneness in the presence of their absence. The loss of my mother changed the way I understand connection after death. It led me to reflect on what remains when a life ends and what continues through memory, relationship, and love. I have come to learn that the connection does not end when a life does.
What role have symbolism and archetypes played in the way you understand yourself and your life?
Because some parts of life cannot be fully understood through logic alone. Most people have experienced moments that feel significant before they can explain why. Meeting someone through a series of coincidences that feel too meaningful to dismiss. Finding yourself in the same kind of relationship again and again until you finally recognize what you have been trying to heal.
Symbols and archetypes offer a way of reflecting on those experiences rather than leaving them unexplored. Astrology, mythology, and Jungian thought encourage self-awareness and reflection. They can reveal recurring fears, desires, and unconscious ways of relating to ourselves and others. They are not about escaping reality, but developing a richer understanding of it.
How did sensitivity become an important part of your work?
Because sensitivity is often treated as something to overcome, when it may actually be a form of intelligence. To feel deeply, notice subtlety, sense emotional shifts, and respond to pain is not weakness. It can become wisdom when it is grounded, and honoured.
What do you hope people will experience here?
Less alone in their depth. Permission to be reflective without feeling shame, spiritual without needing certainty, and creative without having everything figured out.
What inspires you?
People who are unapologetically themselves. Reflective places that hold stories beneath their surface. Moments that arrive unexpectedly and ask you to pay attention. I try to stay open to inspiration rather than chase it. It tends to arrive more honestly that way.
How did your online journal come to life?
To make sense of my own experience. It began as a way to sit with loss, and find my voice. Although it is shared openly, it remains first and foremost a conversation with myself.
How many cats do you have?
We share our home with five whiskered companions: Roger, Charlie, Lady Lupercalia, Victoria James, and Hades. Each is entirely their own being, with distinct personalities, and sensitivities.
Curious? You can visit them on Instagram:
@hartington.house
My husband and I share a deep love for cats rooted in a genuine respect for their sentience and vulnerability. Like all beings capable of feeling and suffering, they deserve kindness, safety, and comfort.
If your heart leans toward helping animals in need, the BC SPCA is an organization where compassion can make a meaningful difference. Or perhaps there is a cat somewhere waiting for the warmth and love only you can offer.
